Friday, Mar. 21, 2003/12:19 am

Art

So tired,

so much work to do.

The buzz of the computer ringing in my ears.

Art GCSE preperation, all due tommorrow. I had nothing done.

I don't feel frantic, not really, i'm going at a slow pace, not sure that i care about it at all.

I'm eating non-stop though, i can't concentrate on work because i'm always shoving something in my mouth. I think i'm using it as an aversion method.

Unable to think properly. My train of thoughts is jaged and split apart, after falling off the track.

I'm going to be up late tonight.

So sick of the sight of sugar paper and acrylics. I just want to go to bed. I think i might just have to give up soon, i've only done a couple of pages out of a whole presentation book i'm supposed to fill but nevermind.

Continueing to live up to my infamous name.

tick.tock.tick.tock. It's midnight now.

I'm the only one awake as usual.

It was hard to communicate with anyone at school today. To be honest i didn't really, listened to music during lessons and left the canteen at lunch to find somewhere silent. People look at me as if i'm a timebomb just waiting to go off. I have a feeling they might be right, i'm scared one day i'll just crack infront of them all.

Got my letter explaining when and where the leavers ball is. I scanned through the print and stared, shocked at the part that said 'includes, a three course meal.' Another thing to worry about, along with the dress and scars. Not sure how i'm going to get around that one. It's easy for me to just purge quickly afterwards but it's the dining infront of everyone part i'm petrified of. I can't even accept crisps at school for gods sake, it makes me so paranoid.

I guess i better get back to what i was doing.

I'm so drained.