Tuesday, Jan. 06, 2004/10:43 pm

reflections

So burnt down,

so swept aside,

tiredweakexhausted

just

keep

dreaming

eyes scared to open

trying to work out why

where i am

how i got here

why i feel so ugly inside/and/out

trying

to look beyond the response into the source.

experiences that have paved the way to where i am standing -

never addressed or revealed.

and no...not abuse, not what you might think.

not dramatic, severe or shocking...just a little reason.

Soon, perhaps, i will spill, complete this confusion.

Ignore the physical responses.

//strains/pain/attack/corruption//

Search underneath, back through the past, back to the beginning.

Where i began to see an unwanted reflection.

h

a

t

r

e

d

alwayshere,

alwaysdeep

alwaysdestructive.